Helping Children Cope With Selling

Children can feel overwhelmed and anxious at the thought of selling and leaving their home. To help them cope, prove age-appropriate information about what to expect, and encourage them to express their concerns. Be alert to behavioral changes and get outside support, as needed.

If you find the job of selling your house and relocating to be overwhelming at times, imagine the effect on your children. Some issues that can arise are the same, regardless of age, while some impact older children far more than younger ones. When the move is not by choice and results from changed circumstances like job loss or divorce, the problems children face can be compounded.

Everyone feels safest and most comfortable in a familiar environment. If it’s the only home a child has known, the prospect of leaving is frightening. To help children handle the challenges of selling and moving, give them age-appropriate information about what to expect. Some will be openly upset and express their concerns, while others may not. That doesn’t mean they’re not in turmoil. Make it a priority to sit down with each child, individually. Encourage him to tell you what’s on his mind and ask questions. Give him all the time he needs. Reassure him about things that will stay the same, but be positive about new opportunities, people and experiences that await him. Yes, the dog is coming, and yes, he can take his favorite things. Your best friend is staying here, but you can keep in touch by email. Explain that changes are a fact of life, but you’re facing them as a family, and everyone needs to work together. Let him make as many decisions as possible about things that affect him.

Children will take cues from how you react. Be positive, but also be honest about your own feelings because it will help children do the same. Watch for changes that may indicate a child is struggling, like mood swings, loss of appetite, a different sleep pattern, argumentative behavior, isolation from friends and family, loss of interest in normal activities and failing to maintain usual dress and grooming habits. If you notice these changes, consider counseling to give the child a safe place to talk about what’s bothering him, and find ways to cope. If your child has a special relationship with a teacher, coach, pastor or family friend, share the news right away so each can offer support.

Smart Selling Tip:
To help children handle the challenges of selling and moving, provide age-appropriate information about what to expect, and encourage them to express their concerns. Be alert to behavioral changes and get outside support, as needed.